Sorry I havn't updated in a while. I was locked in the potty room for... I don't know how many days. I can't count.

Anyway, I suck.

Yesterday, I was not able to go to the mall because I fell out a window trying to catch a fly.

I was walking through the mall and  came across a store that said ''Abercombie & Fitch". At least I think that's what is said. I don't know. I can't read.

Anyway, I went in and saw an adorable denim mini skirt that would look just darling on me.

I went in the dressing room and tried it on. It fit perfectly! I went up to the counter and the lady there looked at me like I was crazy. She said it was kinda weird that a boy would wear a mini skirt. But I don't mind being gay sometimes. Most of the time gay people end up being hot.

I also went into Payless and got a pair of pumps that went perfectly with the skirt! I walked out of the store looking nothing but fashionable.

YUCK YUCK YUCK- Little Billy

OPERATION: JOB INTERVIEW

LB= Little Billy

IG= Interview Guy

IG: So, Little Billy, have you ever had a job before?

LB: Yes.

IG: Where?

LB: In a pickle factory.

IG:Ok... next question.

LB:Poppa hit me.

IG: So you were abused as a child?

LB:No,my parents loved me. I never knew why though.

IG:Um...ok. Now, the next question.

IG:How responsible do you think you are?

LB: I don't know. Does losing your underwear count?

IG:*sigh* I dont know. How many times have you lost it?

LB: Too many times. Like this morning. So now I don't have on any undies.

IG: Too much information. But if we do accept you, you must wear your ''undies'' everyday. Is that clear?

LB: Yes ma'am.

IG: It's sir.

LB: Are you sure? You look like a ma'am to me.

IG: Yes, I'm sure.

LB: Next question!

IG: Ok, what is your orientation?

LB:Gay & straight.

IG: Okkkkkkkkk... Next question.

IG:Have you ever been arrested?

LB:I once killed a fly. I turned myself in, but nothing happened. So I went home & took some Prozac to relieve my stress. Poor, poor fly.

IG:Ok. That was... interesting. In a couple of hours, we will call you to tell you if you are eligible.

LB: Okey dokey!

A couple of hours later:

*RING RING*

LB: Hello?

IG: Hi, this is the man who interviewed you earlier.

LB; Oh.Ola senor interview man.

IG: Ola. Now, you are eligible for a job at McDonalds.

LB: Whoopee!

IG: You will work as a deep fryer.

LB: Do I get to touch the pickles?

IG:Um,no

LB: WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!

IG: * Hangs up*

YUCK YUCK YUCK- Little Billy

Tomorrow, Little Billy will go to the mall. Yay!

 OPERATION:RETARD

Russains

Eat

Turkey

And

Road

Dice

Today I have a job interview. I hope McDonald's will accept me so I can touch the pickles. "Pickles are Gods." I always say!

YUCK  YUCK  YUCK- Little Billy